Day 6 saw us back in Yellowstone.  We also called our first audible, axing the Mammoth Hot Springs in favor of a scenic drive.  To get to the park, however, we drove north to Red Lodge and took the Beartooth Pass down to Yellowstone.  This road climbs close to 10,000 feet through a series of hellacious switchbacks.  It provides some amazing views of the mountains interlaced with crystal clear pools. 

Turn around Josh, there are mountains!

At the top of the mountain we got close enough to snow – which we have never seen before – to assault each other with it.  Snow is much more interesting in the middle of July, for sure, and even more so when hurled at each other with velocity. 



The only thing cooler than the snow is me, right ladies?



Once in Yellowstone, we headed to the Grand Canyon of Yellowstone.  Once we reach the one in Arizona, Chunk will have completed the trifecta – Grand Canyon of Pennsylvania, Grand Canyon of Yellowstone, and THE Grand Canyon.  Stay alert for his impending book deal.  The canyon was pretty impressive with a nice waterfall at the end.  As with most nice things, we wanted to get the perfect vantage point.  This unfortunately involved hiking down a series of stairs and steep slopes to an observation point.  I found out just how difficult it was to breath in the mountain air that day, and I shan’t do it again. 

This leads to a more interesting happening.  The thin air opened a vein in Chunk’s nose at the top of the canyon.  At this point we were a mile away from the vehicle and the absorbent products it contained.  With no napkins or tissues, Chunk faced a choice no man should have to make.  The only options were 1) a tampon or 2) Chunk’s own sock.  Weighing the options, the tampon is likely more absorbent, cleaner, and disposable.  The sock, however, has a major advantage in that it is not a tampon.  The choice was easy: sock.

Chunk would have accepted a tourniquet before a tampon

Enjoy this picture, we lost Chunk getting to this view

After the Grand Canyon of Yellowstone, we meandered to the Roosevelt Lodge for dinner.  On the way, we stopped at the petrified tree.  Apparently Yellowstone was once a lush forest containing trees not unlike what exists in California’s redwood forests.  Changes to the landscape and climate, though, killed them off, but not before mudslides and volcanic activity sealed three stumps in dirt.  Minerals slowely replaced organic matter, turning the wood to stone.  I personally feel this is pretty cool.  One lady there, though, was less than impressed.  “BFD,” she said with disgust at this perversion of nature.  She might have actually been offended and upset at the petrified tree.  The Roosevelt Lodge itself was generally pretty good, although they boil ribs.  Boiled ribs are not true ribs, hence receiving two thumbs down from this guy.

"Pfft. BFD. I have trees from which organic matter was replaced by minerals over a period of centuries all over my lawn."

"Is that Kevin James?!"

Our final activity in Yellowstone was an evening hike through the Lamar Valley.  This particular valley is literally where the buffalo roam.  We stopped counting individual buffalos and started counting herds (six total).  We hiked about three miles back in the valley such that we could not see the road anymore, but had a commanding view of the valley, river, and tree line.  On the way we found a shard of petrified tree (BFD).  On our walk we turned a corner and ran smack into a buffalo.  He was just hanging out under a pair of trees, chewing cud.  He was there for a solid three hours, and completely unimpressed by us.  Unfortunately, this was about the only animal we saw up close.  It was still pretty cool to see the country side at dusk and away from people. 

Kati may or may not have, but definately did, sing "The Hills are Alive"

Confirmation: horns, but no halo

On the way back, we have two major events to report.  First, Chunk and Kati spotted six or eight elk sheds.  It took every fiber of our being not to take them from the park, but we resisted temptation.  Second, Kati stepped on a landmine.  A buffalo land mine.  I’m honestly amazed this was the only poo-related casualty given the number of landmines.  Oddly, Kati was most upset that Becky wouldn’t smell her shoe.

Finally, here is our mid-trip injury report:

1.       Matt – broken laptop and swollen knees from death marching

2.       Chunk – persistent bloody nose from thin air

3.       Becky – twisted ankle from hiking

4.       Josh – dysentery with a touch of cholera

5.       Kati – smelly foot from buffalo poo and strained ocular muscles from eye-rolling

Random Stats:

Hours Driven: 51

Buffalo Herds Seen: 6

Bloody Socks: 1

Quote of the Day:

“Are you really Amish?”

– Waitress to Josh, who’s shirt had a pic of an Amish farmer with tag line “Amish - Fight the Power.”  She seemed sad he was not Amish.

Up Next: Leaving Wyoming via the Tetons.

 

BONUS GAME: Who said the following quote?

“If you bite me, I’m going to slam your head into the ground.  I can palm your head pretty good.”

A.      Kati to Becky

B.      Josh to Chunk

C.      Chunk to Matt

D.      Becky to Kati

E.       All of the Above